An ostentatious man will rather relate a blunder or an absurdity he has committed, than be debarred from talking of his own dear person. Joseph Addison

The smaller the mind the greater the conceit. Aesop

Self-conceit may lead to self-destruction. Aesop

Local Opinion on the Awards:

What can you say !!! If this is an example of the best which Perth can offer, then there is NO hope for anybody who has any kind of talent!!........................................

My company joined the Chamber but we are not going to renew our membership - it's a joke.............................

We thought about joining the Chamber but then we discovered your website and did a bit more research. Well done you've saved us from wasting our time and money...........................

Rock on, great stuff............................

Why don't you guys think about starting up a proper business group? You would get good support, local people are sick of this s***!!..................................

More on the Star Awards.....>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Perthshire Chamber Oscars – Foxtrot Oscar!!!

The Chamber really are immune to ridicule and public opinion

The Perthshire League of Gentleman are at it once again and the little clique of inner members close rank and ensure they look after their 'friends' but at least they provide us with a Source of amusement by marketing Perthshire so badly.

Gather round all you corner shops and tourist attractions for ‘Perthshire’s premier annual business awards’.

So the Chamber of Commerce reports that over 270 people attended the Business Star Awards on 24th November 2005 at the new Perth Concert Hall. Lets take out the solicitors, bankers, Tay Radio, Perthshire Advertiser, council employees, ‘special’ invited guests, cronies, hangers on and spouses – just how many local business people were interested enough to actually attend the Awards Ceremony? How many businesses were represented not how many people attended?

The Perthshire Chamber of Commerce lists 590 members in it’s directory of all sizes so 270 was a pretty poor turn out. Even the new Perth Concert Hall couldn't attract a bigger audience.

With claims of quality entries from 'businesses large and small from across the spectrum' how come there is such a narrow range of winners and haven't we seen some of these names before? Never mind just bung them in a different category and maybe nobody will notice.

The Chamber must be in the running for a lifetime award for recycling!!

Now hands up all those that guessed the winners. Well it wasn't very difficult was it, you should at least have managed 2 or 3.

The Hairdressers Award - foregone conclusion, although you might have got the category wrong.

New Business Award - 'awarded to the new start-up company or organisation that has demonstrated the most effective business operations in the last 18 months'.

Now they must have had to bend the rules slightly on this one (gasp, shock horror) because the Tullibardine Distillery according to their website was re-opened in December 2003 although the distillery opened in 1949. Whichever date you take it just doesn't add up!

The Customer Service Award - Now the customer service award went to Bluesky Experiences who work closely in conjunction with one of the 2004 winners - The Parklands Hotel. Hold on! - didn't Bluesky win an award the year before? Ah, got it now, they take it in turns. Proof indeed that winning these awards has no value to any business in the area apart from pointing the finger to collusion and corruption. Can you trust an award winner!? We think not.

The Little Shop of Horrors Award - This must have been a Source of disappointment for some.

Then there is the best one of all.

The Creative Award.

Absolutely no prizes for guessing this one - far too easy. 'Awarded to the company or organisation that has shown the greatest innovation, flair and impact in marketing activities during 2005' or failing that anyone that gave the sponsor some work.

You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours - another big Source of disappointment for some.

What happened to the Innovation Award this year? Never mind they are probably still researching the real meaning of the word as applied to the 21st century - having got it wrong last year!

Now can someone explain how the Toy Town news reported the winners in Fridays edition of the PA - without pictures?!!

For a paper that only produces 2 editions a week, we can hardly believe that they held back until after the the winners were announced to run the presses. We suspect some prior knowledge here!!

Perthshire Chamber of Commerce Star Awards

Rumours abound that the Perthshire Chamber of Commerce are to increase the number of awards that will be made at their annual dinner later this year to accommodate more of their 'friends'! This is great news for welders and scrap metal merchants who will be kept busy all summer making those Chamber 'Oscars'. We hear that new categories could be:

1. Most in breach of the trades description act. Nominees are a web developer, corporate designer, commercial photographer and IT sales and support.

2. Best use of template award. Two nominees so far.

3. Uncreative Award. Numerous contenders here but one hot favourite.

4. The Hairdressers Award. As it's a foregone conclusion every year, an award has been named specially for the hairdresser.

5. Most unbiased judge of the awards award. No contenders here.

6. Real Innovation Award. Contenders - snack shop put 2 slices of bread together and make a sandwich, man invents wheel, splitting the atom and theory of relativity. Looks like the sandwich shop will have the edge here.

7. Most titles or job descriptions Award.

8. Self publicist Award - could be a close call.

9. Unprofessional / tasteless dress sense Award.

10. Company least likely to do business in Perthshire Award.

You are not rewarded for offering quality services or for daring to have an opinion on issues that affect businesses now and for the future.